There is no "for me", a definition is what it is. Yours seems pretty close, it should be "striking the light-sensitive media". And of course you left out "per unit area". I don't think I need to lecture you about total light (though I believe there are others here, ahem, who have jumped all over others for that same omission).
And that makes my point above about too many variables for a good definition. I could have, say, a photo of a moving racing car in which I have saturated the sensor with light without clipping highlights. An optimal exposure, some might say. But the shutter speed froze the motion of the wheels, and I wanted them blurred. Missing my motion blur requirements, as you stated above. So I could say the photo is underexposed. Someone else might like the frozen effect and say the photo is perfectly exposed. It's Schroedinger's photo, in that the photo is both optimally and non-optimally exposed. And I could say it's either depending on my desire to impress the photo's viewer.
I don't think we're making different points here, but that is my contention that "optimal exposure" contains too many variables to be pinned down to a solid definition. I'd go more vague... it's the right set of exposure variables for the desired effect.